Archive for the ‘law of attraction’ Category
Happy Self-Love Day!
Valentine’s Day brings up so much baggage. It was created by Hallmark to sell greeting cards. And it leaves single people feeling alone and insufficient, and often causes couples to try to measure up to a mythical standard.
So how about we recontextualize this day… as a time when we learn to have more compassion and acceptance of ourselves? Even… self-love?
It breaks my heart when I hear people say that they can have some more compassion toward themselves, but that loving themselves is almost out of the question.
This is also really important professionally: in my opinion, half of what makes a confident, effective speaker is self-love. And it’s most of what makes a genuinely happy person, too.
A few tips:
Know that there’s no such thing as being perfect.
People will love you more when you give yourself permission to be ALL of you.
When you embrace yourself as an ever-evolving, imperfect human, you give others permission to be themselves, too.
So give yourself a break. Today, my wish is that we each spend time to appreciate ourselves, our foibles, our humanity, and our gifts. May we all be gentle and sweet with ourselves.
Everywhere I look, I seem to discover a new marketing term for self-employed professionals. Conscious Entrepreneurs. Evolutionary Entrepreneurs. Heart-Based Entrepreneurs. Visionary Change-Agents.
Not that there’s anything wrong with that. Except that I’ve never met anyone who said, “Hi, I’m a heart-based entrepreneur.” Meanwhile, I’d been trying to avoid stepping on those inert, unconscious entrepreneurs. And if someone did introduce her or himself as an evolutionary entrepreneur, I’d be curious to have them show me their X-Men-like ability to transform chimpanzees into clients.
What these marketing strategies are addressing, I believe, is that many coaches, entrepreneurs, holistic practitioners, and more are just done with the old paradigm to simply make money: they feel compelled to transform the world around them by adhering to their life purpose. And why? Because they believe in something bigger than themselves, and likely have had direct experience with… well, here’s where we run into trouble, because the terms are so loaded. Spirit guides. Angels. And, yes, God. Although if you’d prefer to avoid the Judeo-Christian burdens laid upon it, you can call it the Divine, Spirit, Source, the higher self, Presence, the inner light, or a plethora or other terms.
For many of us spiritually-based (at least in our personal lives) entrepreneurs, Divine Presence is the real reason behind our passions and work in the world. We weren’t given a choice – we must do what we are doing, and must continue to follow our inner guidance. There’s no shortage of us – and our numbers are radically growing. Yes, 2012 is here.
Yet in many circles, we still act as if it were the 1950’s, and a radical act to talk about intuition when in a business context. We don’t want to be labeled “woo-woo.” And, if your spiritual practice is embedded within a particular religious tradition, somehow the old separation of church and business limits us from being overt about it. We don’t want to turn others off, afraid of being blacklisted and having our businesses fail.
Unfortunately, in the course of doing so, we hide what matters most to us, and pretend that Something Larger really doesn’t matter at all or play such a prominent role in our lives. We forget that so many others feel the same way.
So I’m taking this opportunity to “out” myself. I previously had been calling myself a Performance Coach. Yes, I work with self-aware entrepreneurs and professionals who want their businesses to perform well, and to perform as compelling and effective public speakers. The fulltruth is that I tap in intuitively to what is most aligned with your life purpose, as well as with those you are here to serve, and to help you show up as the real you. The truth is that I’m an Intuitive Business Strategist and an Authenticity Coach. “Intuitive” and strategic? You bet: there’s nothing more strategic or authentic than tapping into your Divine Light to guide you forward on your path in a practical, tangible way.
Depending on one’s clientele, this must be negotiated individually, and often slowly. It may take time for this to emerge. But when we have deeper conversations, reveal more about ourselves, and take risks, we create room for others to really be themselves too – and even forge stronger client relationships. By being totally authentic to our core values, and speaking in our highest truth, we light the way for others to come to us.
Note: this does not imply that it is appropriate to begin talking about God in every business conversation. I’ve certainly felt uncomfortable at times when others with very different beliefs have brought up their beliefs out of the blue. The point is: if you are already using somewhat muted terms to talk about spirituality – and especially if your ideal clients actually hold similar worldviews – that’s a really good time to consider being more open.
So whether you’re a conscious entrepreneur, a visionary, or simply work for yourself while definitively knowing you’re here for a reason, I have one question for you:
Are you ready to come out of the spiritual closet?
what is real power? (2 of 2)
Posted on: October 21, 2011
*So what’s Real power?*
…Real power emanates from within.
…Speaking with power means standing in your truth – and declaring it to the world.
…True power means that you are as present to your own personal experience, as you are to the person or audience to whom you are speaking. You don’t give yourself away.
…And, most importantly…
True power is deeply connected to living and expressing your life purpose.
Which, right now, others desperately need to hear.
I don’t know if you’ve felt it, but things are accelerating. So many people, including myself, are being asked to make sure our work in the world is truly in alignment with our real selves.
This is why my work has taken new shape. My coaching and workshops have always derived from combining public speaking and theater methods with self-development tools and business savvy… but I used to be afraid to declare it, wondering if the performers I coach would get put off by the business emphasis, or feeling unsure about how entrepreneurs and professionals would react to this deeper approach. But by doing so, I’m speaking the true power of what I do… and the reaction has been amazing, validating my highest purpose.
… And the same can go for you.
Are you ready to speak the real truth?
what is real power? (1 of 2)
Posted on: October 20, 2011
I’ve been really interested for the past several months with the idea of “power.” It’s rife with misunderstandings and negative connotations… and so much potential. For some, power equates to “power over” – where one person must win out over others. As the media, both alternative and mainstream, regularly depicts both abuses and atrocities by those who possess power, this is of course a common misunderstanding, But it’s not true power.
True power does not arise from oppressing others or through fights. Speaking with power does not mean anyone else is being diminished or controlled. And it doesn’t mean that you have to Push to make your Point. It also does not mean you are trying to influence or control others – or please them.
Next: the real deal.
3 ways to stay humble
Posted on: September 30, 2011
If you are making a difference in the world, it can be hard to be humble, and live with humility. Keep in mind that this does not mean being “humiliated,” but to live graciously and without trying to prove yourself with a big ego. Here are three easy ways:
- Put things in perspective. No matter what, there is always someone doing things much bigger than you are doing. And, there are many people suffering, who would consider you their idol. Sound like a good middle ground?
- Turn it over to Divine Source. You are here to serve and help others. It is your privilege to do so in your own unique way. Know that you have been given gifts, and exercise them with heartfelt love.
- Do menial labor. What? Am I serious? You bet. If you think you’re so great, try out a task that pays minimum wage. Chances are, you’ll find out that someone earning very little is very likely working very hard. For all that you do, remember that others are in need. Help them – when you’re in their debt, pay more than necessary and overtip waiters.
How can we be both powerful and humble? Where does humility play a role within empowerment?
Some perspective:
If we are in our power, and fully stand in the truth of what we are here to do on this planet and in our own communities, we simply need to do our work. When we try to be powerful, we effort from the ego. That is not true power. Real powerful is effortless.
In the Law of Attraction, it’s essential to know you are deserving of what you visualize – that you are worthy. Don’t confuse worthiness with being humble.
Humility comes more around receiving what we have visualized – and, in my book, the bigger the gift, the more humble we should be. To know that we are truly worthy of something wonderful is to let go of the ego.
And… don’t try so much.
Trying hard to create results means trying to force results. And that’s just not how the world works – or, not without repercussions. If you try to force someone to do something, they may do it, but it’ll fly back in your face sooner or later.
Action: Relax into your power. Be thankful for all you have received, and all that is coming your way… whether or not you can see it.
Next: 3 ways to stay humble.
I more often talk about empowerment, and how we need to step into our power. What goes along with it as its important sidekick is humility.
It’s too easy for power to bring hubris. Many amazing people are so afraid to really be powerful – because so may strong figures in current and past world history have also been dominating and abusive. And many people suffered through difficult childhood experiences – and then have walked in the world as the mild-mannered counterpart of their true self, which is waiting to be powerful and strong.
Yes, we must be powerful – to live our soul’s purpose in the world is to live our full truth.
The secret? Don’t try to be powerful. Just be true to yourself.
Part 2: Don’t try so hard – and keep perspective.
Do you dwell in inaction, afraid of making mistakes or “not doing it right?” Waiting to have all the right answers before you move forward? Want to see what others do first, and then make your move?
I have news for you: if this is you, you’re missing out. A client of mine today was telling me about attending a networking event last week where he didn’t make any contacts to find potential clients, and felt like it had been a waste of time. I informed him that the opposite was true: it was a success, because he took action. He actually went out and tried something! He got practice at networking, and the next time it’ll be easier.
The biggest way to hold yourself back is simply by not trying. So do yourself a favor: take imperfect action.
Action: Today, make a big mistake. Or, at least risk it. And reward yourself for doing something new.
proof for the law of attraction (4 of 5): the power of disbelief and skepticism
Posted on: August 19, 2011
We’ve asked the question: Is the Law of Attraction real? And I’ve given a couple of examples. Yet you may have a difficult time believing in it – especially if you’ve had many struggles. It’s difficult to conceive of things being so radically different – or maybe you can only conceive of change happening in certain aspects of your life, and not in others.
So perhaps you’re choosing to be skeptical and not believe in the Law of Attraction… or limiting its scope. Guess what? You may in fact be creating your own limitations. Why? Because the following statement goes both ways:
Where your thoughts go, energy flows.
Now, this actually includes both thoughts and emotions – meaning that if you have a daily affirmation, but emotionally you are still stuck in an old feeling and belief – it’s not going to change. And by continuing to reinforce your belief that it’s not real, you simply make it not work for you.
Keep in mind – the Law of Attraction is simply the latest iteration of a practice that’s been around for thousands of years. It’s not new. But remember the essence:
You are a Co-Creator, along with Divine Source, of Your World.
Part 5: Is there an exception to the Law of Attraction? Am I responsible for absolutely everything?
Part 2 was one example of how it works… Need more? Here’s another great Law of Attraction story. I was just at a great networking event run by the incomparable Patrick Schwerdtfeger, a social media guru and international speaker. While chatting, we started discussing the Law of Attraction, and he mentioned that he’s spoken everywhere in the world he desires. His method?
“When I want to speak in a country, I pull out my smartphone,” Patrick told me. “I go to my weather app, and add that country as one of my saved locations. I then focus on that country every time I check the weather. Soon after, I’ll get a call for a speaking engagement there.” Aruba? Check. Cancun? Yup. India? Got it.
..By the way, speaking of India – I’ll be co-leading a two-week trip to India in January – a traveling spiritual workshop and journey – along with my partner Alicia Dattner (known for her comedic solo performance about her travels to India, Eat, Pray, Laugh! Want to join us?
Part 4: The power of disbelieving.
