Posts Tagged ‘motivation’
Happy New Year! Today’s typically the day for discussing resolutions. We all know there’s a trap in saying we want something… and yet it not happening. So let’s discuss another term that often traps us: potential.
Right now, “potential” is one of my least favorite words. I have so many big dreams for what I want to do with my life’s purpose and work in the world… that it can start to feel like a burden after a while. Feel familiar? I’ve also experienced this with dating. We can feel a lot of love, connection, commonalities, and potential for a life together… and yet find ourselves struggling due to whatever dynamics are present. The potential is real, but is not what’s at hand.
Focusing on potential keeps us stuck in possibility – and can even prolong suffering. While it’s good to dream, it’s very different than actually choosing to take action and bring something into reality.
Similarly, we may judge ourselves as not having potential, talent, or the ability to do something… even though we actually can! It’s often our beliefs about ourselves that get in our way. In this case, our perception of potential is a negative and limiting trap.
Whether it’s in reference to yourself, a relationship, a job, or anything in your life, here’s my suggestion: forget about its potential. Instead, decide what you actually want to happen. To create.
Here are a series of steps that I’ve found to be helpful:
1) Examine your current circumstances. What do you want to change, or bring into being?
2) With that in mind, look at what you’re willing to take action on in the immediate future. Don’t think too far off. And your goal can be a stretch, but make sure it feels exciting, and not too big that it weighs you down. (You can always do this exercise again in the future with bigger goals – so just what truly feels like the next steps right now.) You may want to go into meditation, and ask Source to provide you with insight – but also really listen inwardly as well. What choices make your body and energy feel lighter and freer?
3) Acknowledge outside circumstances that are beyond your control. Know what you absolutely can’t change. Often, this is another person, unless they want to and are ready. Note areas that feel intractable… and look at steps 4 and 6 to make sure that’s true.
4) Figure out where you need help – and then research and utilize outside resources. Find out where you need assistance. There may be more possibility for bringing things to fruition than you currently realize, and we need help with areas where we’re not experts (unless we want to take a really, really long time). This could mean reading a book, looking into a loan or grant for personal or professional uses, or getting support from a coach or professional, among other things.
5) Make an action plan – and do it! Get as specific as possible, with small steps that are doable – not big goals that are intangible. There’s a difference between “get a job” or “get a client” and “go to 2 networking events this week, and follow up with new connections.” And if that’s too hard, simply researching networking events is a good step – or even turning on the computer. Break it down into whatever feels doable.
6) Get help with your blocks. Nothing to be ashamed about here – we all have them. Whether with a therapist, healer, coach, or perhaps a skilled friend who knows you well, let go of the illusion that you can do it alone. We all need support.
7) Celebrate! Even taking little steps is a big thing if you haven’t been doing them. Give yourself little rewards, and be kind to yourself.
You may think of other steps you need as well; this just a template that I hope you find useful.
Now, the truth is that I’m really writing this for myself. And hopefully it’ll help you too. I’m committing to doing this with my life. Want to join me? (I’m pretty busy with other projects, but if there were sufficient interest, I’d consider starting up what I call an Inspiration Team – so that we can do it together. This isn’t a pitch; I just like to be of service.)
What would you like to create in 2014? I’d love to hear about it, and to hear your thoughts on my pretty unconventional take on potential.
Please leave your thoughts below in a comment. Blessings for a joyous, prosperous and wholly fulfilling 2014!!!
how to stop procrastinating
Posted on: December 22, 2011
Ahhhh, procrastination. It’s so easy to put things off – just…a little… more. Soon. It’ll happen. Right?
But of course there’s a deeper reason why it’s not happening. Very possibly fear. Fear of failure. Of being rejected. Of doing such a bad job that the ground opens up and swallows us whole. Hey, it could happen.
But it probably won’t. In fact, the only true failure is not doing anything at all.
Action: Whatever you need to do – whether it’s a phone call or a new project, or even exercise – do it badly. Just try it. You’ll learn from the experience, and the next time will be better.
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My dear friend Perry, a fellow life-long theater professional, has an interesting honor: New Jersey’s version of the Tony Awards are called the Perry Awards – named after my friend. How did he get this honor? For being recognized for all of his work as an actor, director and teacher? For being on Broadway?
Nope. They’re called the Perry Awards because he started them himself. When he was 11. In his parents’ living room.
His parents were in the theater, and he decided there should be local awards. So he started it. Now, you wouldn’t know that easily now, since it’s a huge annual gala. But it began with a single, humble step, by an eleven year-old.
Action: Think about what you want to accomplish. Don’t get bogged down by all you need to do, and don’t even try to execute it at its biggest scale. Do something small, and do just one little step – but definitely do it.
how to get excited!
Posted on: February 8, 2011
Wow! I’m so excited. Really! …Why? Because I get to write to you here. No, really – while I love coaching and teaching workshops and doing yoga and all that jazz, blogging on inspiration has become addicting. Because it makes me focus my energy on things that uplift me, and that might uplift you – things that I also need to always reinforce within myself. Yep – it’s a spiritual practice. So suddenly, I walk around all abuzz about how to live life better and more fully. Not that it was completely out of mind previously, but it was just what the doctor ordered. Hoo ha!
So… what’s yours? What do you need to do that excites you, motivates you, and brings you energy throughout your day?
Action:
- Think back to something you love. Maybe it’s been days, or maybe years, since you did it.
- Whether it’s crocheting or playing tennis, carve out time regularly so it’s part of your life.
- Or, try something new. If you don’t have time for that activity, perhaps there’s something similar that might get you marching down main street.
Remember, these are activities – that is, things you do – not things you merely think about. Take action, and bring vivacity, motivation and excitement back into your life.
The week is long. The economy is in the dumps. No one likes you and your cat only pretends so that it will be fed. Yeah, yeah, there are always reasons to feel down and not inspired or motivated. But the sun is still shining and our basic goodness still resides. Plus, it’s your responsibility – so choose to make a change. Here are a few things to try.
- Get outside. Go for a short walk… even if it’s freezing!
- For 2 minutes, do nothing but take really deep breaths. Envision being filled with whatever quality is most beneficial. (More detail forthcoming.)
- Watch an inspiring speech on YouTube (perhaps a TED presentation).
- Write a gratitude list. Right now. Literally write (or type) 5 things that you’re truly thankful for.
- Close your eyes, and for two minutes, visualize how you will feel after you get done what is needed!
Oh, hi there. Thanks for dropping by. I like to cheer you up when I can – motivate, inspire, bring to life your truth.
But not in the way you’re expecting. If you’re seeking deep truth, well, there’s only one place you’ll know that it’s true for sure. And that’s inside. Sure, someone else may say something, or you may read an inspiring quote that moves you, but you’ll have to listen to your inner wisdom to know if it’s true.
See, what’s true for you may not be true for someone else. Is there One Truth? Well, maybe. But maybe we lost touch with that when we grew up. The seductive Outer World teases and tells us what we want to hear – and is happy to provide all the answers for us.
To be continued….
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