Posts Tagged ‘turning wounds into power’
transforming nervousness into power (4 of 5): investment and perfectionism
Posted on: April 13, 2011
At its very core, why do you get nervous or fearful?
Because you care. Because something is important to you.
If you were apathetic to an issue or situation, you wouldn’t be nervous at all. But apathy is not exactly a desired experience, is it?
Wherever it may happen, and for whatever reason it rears its head, getting nervous means that you desire to live fully, and to be the best version of yourself. Yes, it’s good: it means you’re invested in life.
The dark side of this investment, which creates fear and nervousness, is perfectionism – the imaginary idea that it’s somehow possible to be “perfect.” This myth, aided by Hollywood movies and TV “reality” shows that purport to portray people’s actual lives, provides standards that no real person can match.
Action: Instead of fixating on imaginary perfection that doesn’t exist, and makes you uncomfortable and nervous, simply take action and try something new. Embrace mistakes, and learn from them.
Last post, I talked about how we can grow from our pain. However, there’s yet another step we can take: use our wounds to inspire people, and to uplift ourselves.
As a child, I was painfully shy and had few friends. In fact, as a very young boy I developed a stutter when my father tried to teach me to read at too early an age; I just wasn’t ready.
Yet somehow, in high school I ended up on the speech and debate team… and did well, even amidst social awkwardness.
While I had many steps along the way, including becoming an actor, director, high school and college speech coach, and graduate degrees in communication and theater, I’ve ended up with my own business as a coach – a personal growth-oriented coaching and workshops to help people speak from their full power, and “perform” in life with authenticity, truth, and effectiveness.
Many others have overcome far greater adversity (did you know James Earl Jones had a strong stutter as well?)… but that’s my story. And what’s yours?
Action: Take an inventory of what’s been most painful for you in your life. What have you overcome, partially or fully? Or, what is still a challenge? How can you envision using it to inspire others?
the inspiration blog 