the inspiration blog

how to love yourself more: dealing with the inner critic (part 3)

Posted on: February 9, 2011

Let’s look a little more at that inner critic. It might be viewed as the internalized Voice of Society. Or perhaps the Stater of Idealized Norms (how we Think everyone is supposed to be like). Or the If-I-Was-A-Good/Healthy/Functioning-Person-I’d-Be-That-Way Declarer. Or the Comparer (“That person is obviously doing much better than you are. Why don’t you do that?”). Or the Arbiter of What is Good and Proper (“and you obviously are not it”).

Phew.

We hold everything a little too tightly, don’t we? Here’s a way to give yourself more space and permission to be, well, human.

Action: Next time you find that you’re judging yourself…

  1. Close your eyes, take some deep breaths, and physically relax your body, especially your shoulders, chest and solar plexus (which is where we often store these feelings).
  2. Imagine that your body expands a few feet out, giving more room for these feelings.
  3. Let it keep expanding as much as necessary – to the size of the room… the building… the city… and so on, until you really have enough space and permission for all that you are. (Note: if it ever feels too big or spacey, just adjust it to be somewhat smaller again.)

Yes. You can give yourself that much Space and Permission to Be – All That You Are.


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